Saturday, May 21, 2011

Starlight Starbright

Laptop

Night Tea

Jammies

Ipod's Heartsongs

And the night sky full of stars just awaiting wishes of all sorts.

May......

It's exactly that....... Dot... Dot... Dot

Since I was 12 years old May has been full of bad luck. This year, tables have turned....so far. We still have a few days left. I'm not focused on the "what if's" like I once was. Now I just give a heartfelt "thanks" for each day I make it through.

One occurence in particular has my heart going a little wonky

May 31st
The day "he" came into my life
As well as the day "he" walked out of my life.

This put the cherry on top of the shit sundae's I had been served May after May.
The difference this year from the ones before is I'm closer to the top of the mountain I've been climbing the last few years.

For the havoc I've given my exhusband for what he put me and my family through and as hurt as I still am, I am thankful. Sometimes the best lessons in life are learned through a time of pain. When I was young I used to dream I could fly. It's become my motto in life. "Live life learning to fly" There is a reason for everything right. Well perhaps my marriage to Justin was for the mere purpose that he was the one to give me the gift of wings in order for me to fly. Without him I wouldn't have gone through the amount of healing I have. My life has changed. My heart has this love and hope and wonder within that had never existed before. So how can I not be thankful. He forced me to live again.

There is a poem that is not only my favorite but has become my signature...
It's by a french poet named Guillaume Apollinaire
"Come to the edge."
"We can't. We're afraid."
"Come to the edge."
"We can't. We will fall."
"Come to the edge."
And they came.
And he pushed them.
And they flew.

Justin pushed me to the edge. I was falling and just as I was about to hit the rock bottom....
I flew.
Now I thank you!
So now I shalt not celebrate the anniversary of the upcoming date with regret but with thanks.
I love him so dearly for giving me this gift....

Always.

Here is my new May theme song.
Come fly with me.....and enjoy................................. <3
Posted above :)

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